Being Human
by Grenniffin
Summary: Remus hasn't seen her in so many years; the girl he fell in love with when he was sixteen. Now she's back and his feelings haven't changed. Starts in the Marauders era and into PoA. Remus/OC
1. In The Great Hall

**I know Remus/OC isn't very popular, but I freaking love him. So, for your reading pleasure, I present ****_Being Human._**

* * *

When you're different, people either love you for it or loathe you for it. When you're different, nothing ever goes over easily or according to your plan. Cordelia Leonova was different. She stood out from all of the other girls in the school, in the opinion of Remus Lupin, in the best way possible. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen in his sixteen years of life. Her long, black hair contrasted nicely with her light skin. Her dark eyes could send shivers up his spine whenever she locked them with his in Potions Class. She always wore her skirts a little high, making him extremely jealous whenever the other boys would look at her as she walked by.

She sat with the other Slytherin girls during supper, her cheek leaning on her palm as she half listened to Eva Pargass tell the story of how she met some famous person that her father knew from some executive luncheon. Cordelia never ate much, but she seemed healthy enough.

Remus sat on the other side of the room as James and Sirius scarfed down mashed potatoes and gnawed on turkey legs, tossing the bones onto his plate, which he didn't notice until his hand accidentally knocked over the pile as he reached for his drink.

"Oh, very nice." he grumbled, sweeping the wet remains off of his dinner plate.

"Just go up and talk to her, mate." Sirius said, before attempting to clear his full mouth with pumpkin juice. "Just say, 'Cora, I think about you when I have a wank.' That'll get her attention."

Remus rolled his eyes as James and Sirius shared a laugh at his expense.

"That'll get me expelled."

James swallowed his food and wiped his mouth with the napkin that he held in his lap. Remus was amazed that, even though James ate like a starved Hippogriff, he had the manners of a head of state.

"She really is a nice girl, Moony. Couldn't tell you why she's in Slytherin." the Potter smiled as he wrapped his arm around his long time girlfriend Lily Evans who sat to his left. Remus longed for that intimacy with someone. He longed for that intimacy with Cordelia. "We have plenty of nice girls in Gryffindor, anyway, right Lily?"

Lily laughed lightly and pushed James away, breathing out an "Honestly, James." before turning back to Alice Collins.

It was true. There were loads of girls in Gryffindor house that Remus could date, but he didn't want any of them. Cordelia Leonova would be the death of him; he knew it.

* * *

Cora sat, bored out of her mind, listening to Eva tell the same story that she had been telling for the past two weeks. Pushing the mushy peas around on her plate, she drifted in and out of what her friend was saying.

Suddenly, she felt eyes upon her, making her look up when they didn't move away. Lifting her head, her eyes connected with Remus Lupin's. He was in her Potions Class; he sat right beside her and sometimes she had to ask to borrow a sheet of parchment from him. He must have thought she was a complete idiot for never being prepared for class.

Raising her hand, she waved slightly at him. He looked as though he had been caught red handed doing something he shouldn't. He brought his hand up quickly, knocking over a new pile of bones that sat on his dinner plate before looking back up at her and seeing that she was still looking at him. A light smile appeared on her face as she saw him wave back awkwardly.

He was so handsome to her. His rich brown hair was so thick that it reminded her of a wolf's winter coat. Sometimes in Potions, she would sit and think about touching it, running her hands through it and feeling the soft texture.

His brown eyes matched the color of his hair perfectly. She loved how they crinkled on the sides when he smiled widely.

"Cora, are you listening to me?"

Cordelia whipped her head to her left, seeing Eva's sour face staring at her, along with her other friends. She smiled awkwardly.

"Of course, Eva. You said that he took you to visit his villa in France. That must have been very lovely."

Eva's face held the expression as she nodded slightly, "Right, as I was saying."

The small group turned its' attention, begrudgingly, back to Eva. Cordelia, however, turned her's to the Lupin that had now started talking to his friends.

She stifled a sigh that threatened to escape her. No matter how much she liked Remus, no matter what she did, she couldn't change the fact that she was different. A monster; well, half monster. All of her friends, everyone in the school, just assumed that she was like them. She walked like them, talked like them, she even ate like them _sometimes._

Her father, Talis Leonov, was a Russian vampire. When her mother, Ramona, met him, she was doing research in Siberia for the Ministry of Magic's Beings and Beasts divisions. Ramona, then Treefoil, fell in love with Talis, a tall, wiry, dark haired vampire. They married and, two years later, had Cordelia, to the surprise of everyone. Her mother called her a miracle. Her Grandmother Treefoil called her a freak. When Cordelia was eight, her parents beat the odds again when her mother became pregnant with her younger brother Ivor. She never could wrap her mind around how her mother that was alive and her father that was undead could reproduce. Magic, she guessed.

Professor Dumbledore was the only person she trusted with her secret. No one in the entire school knew about it and Remus wasn't going to be the first person to find out; not if she had any say in the matter.

* * *

Remus moped from his side of the room, watching Cordelia return to her attention to her friends.

"Come now, Moony." Sirius said, slapping his hand on his friend's shoulder. "I know in the end you'll win the love of Miss Leonova."

Remus shrugged Sirius's hand off of him, "No, Padfoot."

At once, James and Sirius drew a more serious attitude. They knew he was hurting. They knew what he would have to divulge if he were to get involved with her. Remus's pain worsened as he thought of transforming right in front of her. Werewolves weren't thought of as sane, impartial creatures— and for good reason. The only people that knew were teachers, Prongs, Padfoot, Wormtail, and Severus Snape (who kept the secret under penalty of severe beating).

What would she think if she was brought along to the 'Shrieking Shack' when he was in his monthly transformation? He didn't think he could stomach the look of terror that would surely break out on her face.

"She's probably not even worth it." Peter piped up, dropping another scoop of ice cream onto his plate. He looked over at his friends to see Remus, James, and Sirius glaring back at him. "What? I'm just trying to make you feel better."

Remus downed the rest of his water before standing up from the long table, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "Well, don't, Wormtail."

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**Please review and tell me what you think!**


	2. In Potions Class

**So... yea. That was embarrassing. Sorry about that code leaking all over the place. Anyways, on with the story. Thanks Phantom-of-light for calling my attention to it!**

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Cordelia's Alchemy class always seemed to drag on for hours, even though it was only an hour and a half long. She found it curious that the roster was composed almost completely of Slytherins, but she wasn't totally surprised. Almost every one of them was enrolled in the course because the class description promised to teach how to turn ordinary metals into gold.

She sat in the middle of the room at a desk designed to fit two students. Severus Snape sat beside her, furiously taking notes, hanging on Professor Ripplestone's every word. The truth was, she really had no interest in Alchemy, whatsoever. The class was exclusively available to sixth and seventh years and only upon sufficient demand. Severus had begged her to enroll, boosting his chances of the class being opened. Begrudgingly, she agreed with the condition that he helped her with the homework Professor Ripplestone assigned so freely.

Cordelia watched as the professor scribbled symbol after symbol onto the chalkboard; equations in some foreign language that she had never seen. Every once in a while, she would tap Severus, only to be waved away with a harshly whispered, "I'll explain later."

* * *

When the bell finally rang, Cordelia could have screamed with joy. Standing in front the rounded stone doorway, she waited for Severus outside the doors, as she did at the end of every period they shared.

Severus was the first person to befriend her at Hogwarts her first year, so naturally she felt a sense of loyalty to him. She knew his deep bond with Lily Evans and how his heart broke whenever she and James would cozy up together in public. She also knew how Sirius and James bullied him, mercilessly; something that only happened when she wasn't around. Every now and then, she would ask him if Remus was involved, but Severus would just shake his head and retort with a, "Well, he sure as hell doesn't stop them."

"Ready to go?"

Her friend's familiar voice broke her from her thoughts. Severus stood beside her, his books in one hand while the other pushed his long, dark hair behind his ear. Cora simply nodded as she adjusted her books in her arms and started the long trek to the Great Hall, Severus steadily walking beside.

* * *

"I just don't understand, Sev. I hope you're getting all of your kicks from this class, because I certainly am not." she said, sitting her books on the dining table. Severus sat next to her, grabbing a plate and dressing it with a turkey sandwich. Cordelia pulled her notes from the class from her notebook, scanning them to see if she could recognize some shred of information.

"Stop being so dramatic, Cora." he said with a flat tone as he filled his goblet with pumpkin juice. "It's all self explanatory."

Cordelia let out a throaty laugh, "We can't all be potions geniuses, Sev."

As she gazed down at the notes, she noticed a plate being slid into the tabletop background and a hand reaching from the side, tugging at the parchment. Looking to the source, she saw Severus, sandwich in one hand and her notes in the other.

"Eat something, will you?"

Cordelia shook her hand, pulling her notes from his reach. "I'm not hungry."

Even though she hadn't eaten it in a few days, she still wasn't hungry for _solid _food. Now, if a deer was lying on the table, crimson seeping out of fresh bite marks, she would pounce without a second thought; sandwiches, however, she didn't care for at the moment.

Severus sighed, taking another bite of his sandwich and swallowing, "You know, in all of the time I've known you, I think I've only seen you eat two full meals."

Cora just rolled her eyes, "Now who's being dramatic?"

A sudden loud laugh caught Cordelia's attention, causing her eyes to snap up and find the source. Two table down sat Remus and his friends. Sirius looked furious as he stood, his lap dripping with spilled drink, while Remus and Peter Pettigrew laughed from the other side of the table.

"Look at them." Serverus's tone dripped with distain, "Bloody idiots."

Cordelia leaned forward on her arms as they crossed underneath her breasts. A small smile found its way across her face as Remus's laugh rang her ears.

"Not all of them."

Severus's hand flew up, gripping her upper arm tightly. Face twisted with worry, he looked at her. His dark eyes met hers, something inside them pleading with her.

"Stay away from them, Cora." A seriousness filled his voice, "They are dangerous."

Cordelia swallowed a smile that tried to force its way onto her lips, stifling a laugh.

_'If you only knew the truth, Sev.' _she thought, '_I doubt you'd want to stay in the same school as me, let alone have lunch.'_

For Severus's sake, she put on a face of concern, nodding and agreeing to keep her distance. This, however, she didn't plan on keeping the agreement for long, seeing as she had Potions with Remus right after lunch.

The two Slytherins parted company, each going their own way. Cordelia held her Potions book against her chest as she walked to the far end of the castle. Severus' words rang in her mind, his serious tone striking her with discomfort.

'_Really, how dangerous could they be?' _she thought, putting her friend's warning to the back of her mind, _"I've probably seen worse when I look into a mirror."_

* * *

Remus looked around the room, waiting for Cordelia to make an appearance. He stood in front of his station, drumming his fingers on the wooden tabletop. Why was it that she was always the last person in class? Did she do it just to build anticipation? Probably not.

It was obvious that today the class would be working in partners and Remus would be damned if he was not going to be Cordelia's. Eva, her usual partner, was out sick with some blessed virus that Remus could only imagine that God Himself sent down so he could have a go at Cordelia.

"Ready for class, Moony?" Peter's voice was like nails on a chalkboard at the moment. He watched his chubby friend sit his books on the table and smile up at him, dashing Remus's dreams.

"Wormtail," he growled, "Go find another partner."

Peter drew a hurt expression. "We always work together, Remus."

Remus gritted his teeth, trying not to explode on Wormtail, "That's when Cordelia has a partner. Today Eva is sick, so I'm going to offer my help."

Remus watched as Peter gathered up his books and sulked off, murmuring about the type 'help' Remus was going offer. Whatever, Remus would make up with him later.

At last, he spied Cordelia walk through the stone doorway, her books tightly pressed against her chest. He saw her look around, maybe looking for Eva, and form a confused look when she couldn't find her normal spot.

"Miss Leonova," her head snapped toward the front of the room as their professor called to her, "I would very much like to start class and it is going to be impossible to do so with you wandering around like a lost mooncalf. Please, find a place to work. Mr. Lupin seems to have an open spot."

Remus looked back at her, following her with his eyes as she made her way to him. His heart skipped a beat when her eyes locked with his and she flashed her white smile.

"Do you mind? Eva seems to have skipped today."

The young werewolf smiled back awkwardly, "O-of course not!" he stammered, his voice cracking in the middle of his words. '_Oh God, no.'_

Cordelia laughed lightly, thanking him before opening her notebook and turning her attention to the professor.

Remus inwardly assaulted himself. Why did he think he would be able to do this?

_'It's going to be a long class.'_

"Alright class," Professor Vander said loudly. She never could find the appropriate volume for her voice, Cordelia thought every time she opened her mouth. "Today we are making doxycide, a very useful repellant."

"Right," Cordelia whispered to Remus, "We're only making it because Professor Sprout has an infestation and is too cheap to buy any herself."

The comment earned a laugh from Remus, but also a glare from Professor Vander before going on with the lesson.

"Ears like a wolf, that woman has." Remus grumbled, this time it was Cordelia's turn to laugh.

* * *

The potion was very simple, even for someone like Cordelia who only made an Acceptable on her O.W.L. examination. Severus, being the potions master he was, taught her a few tricks to improve the quality of the concoction. When she asked him why he hadn't shown her before the accursed exam, he just shrugged and went back to slicing newt feet.

"Oh," she said, stopping Remus from taking the first cut from their dragon liver. "If it's cut longways, it boosts the potency."

Remus looked from her back to the small hunk of meat before chopping it into long strips.

"How do you know that?" he questioned, letting the meat slide off of his knife into the cauldron.

"Severus taught me. He's brilliant at potions." she said, measuring out the essence of Hemlock and chasing the liver with it. She heard a snort come from him.

"He's something alright."

Cordelia rolled her eyes, stirring the soupy mixture with a wooden spoon, "I don't know why you lot don't get on. He's a very nice person."

Remus looked at her, flabbergasted. Snivellous Snape: the nice guy of Slytherin house. Now he'd heard everything. She noticed the look of disbelief on his face.

"He was my first friend at Hogwarts."

Remus nodded, understanding. It was the same relationship he had with Peter; he had only become friends with James and Sirius in his second year.

The two continued their work in silence. Remus began mashing leaves with his mortar and pestle, releasing their juices. The urge to stir their mixture compelled him, causing him to reflexively reach for the wooden spoon. Instead of the grainy wood, however, he felt nothing but chilled flesh. Looking up, he saw Cordelia's hand covered with his as she held the spoon. His pulse quickened. His throat was suddenly a desert. Why did he think he could do this?

"Remus?"

He tilted his head up, following the sound of her soft voice. The two stared at each other for what seemed like hours, neither of them moving. His palm was so rough, he felt as though he would ruin her soft skin with it. He felt as though he was dirtying pure snow, but something inside him wanted more.

"Ahem."

Professor Vander's loud voice caused them to jump apart. Cordelia furiously stirred while Remus took quickly to his mortar and pestle again.

"If you two are quite finished having your cosmic moment, I think you're both going to be late for your next classes."

The older woman gestured to the empty classroom, an annoyed look adorning her narrow face. Both students mumbled their apologies as they gathered their possessions and hurriedly exited.

* * *

The hallways were nearly empty as they made their way across the grounds.

"I'm sorry that we failed our poisons assignment." Cordelia winced, guilt washing over her. Remus had probably never failed anything in his entire life. "And that you're going to be late for class."

The crinkles that she loved to see so much appeared by his eyes as he smiled widely at her.

"I'm a Prefect. I'll just say I was helping someone find their way to a classroom."

Cordelia cocked her eyebrow at him questioningly, "Lies and deceit, eh? Now you're thinking like a Slytherin."

They stood in the empty corridor at the halfway point between their two classrooms. Cordelia shifted uncomfortably, torn between the need to be in class and the want to stay with Remus.

"I guess I'd better go." her voice came out as a whisper. Remus smiled at her, making the battle within her become more fierce. He started to back up slowly, the smile never leaving his face.

"Take care, Cordelia." He called before turning around and walking briskly toward his class. She smiled after him as she too turned on her heel and made her way unhurriedly to hers.

"Take care, Remus."

* * *

"'Take care?' Who the bloody hell says that?"

Remus shot Sirius a glare from his bed. He lay his book down on his chest, making sure not to lose his place, and propped himself up on his elbows.

"What would you have suggested I say, Pads?"

Sirius stood on his bed, his hands wrapped around the top of the wooden support for the canopy which groaned as he swung from it, down onto the floor. James sat on his bed, his elbows sitting on his knees with his head being supported by his interlaced fingers.

"I, for one," Sirius said, looking down at his friend, "Would have proposed right then and there."

Remus rolled his eyes, dropping himself back onto the bed and picking up his book. "Right."

A mischievous smile formed on the Black's face as he crossed the room and knelt before James.

"Oh, Miss Leonova." he started loudly, making his voice deep, "I know I've only been stalking you since we were second years and this year was the first time I've ever actually spoken to you, but I feel the time is right for us to wed. Will you marry me?"

James threw his hands up in the air in and gasped in fake surprise. "Oh!" he said, making his voice unnaturally high, "Of course, Remus… Um… what was your last name again?"

The two collapsed onto James' bed in laughter. After a few moments, they'd collected themselves enough to look up at their friend, who didn't seem as amused.

"Ha. Ha." Remus said, his voice flat. "Are you quite finished?"

"Oh, Moony," James smiled, adjusting his glasses, "I'm sure your window of opportunity will open."

Remus continued to stare at his book, not really caring what was on the pages. Part of him wanted what James had said to be true, but part of him wished he had never developed feelings for this girl in the first place. He fought the urge to sigh deeply. She could never accept him with his furry little problem. He could never forgive himself if he hurt her, accidentally or otherwise. He never really knew himself in wolf form; his actions seemed like that of a total stranger that infiltrated his body.

Closing his eyes, he breathed deeply, trying to get some peace from the situation. The image of her, gazing up at him with his hand covering hers had burned itself to the inside of his eyelids. Frustration built up inside him. Frustration that was going to make for a particularly difficult transformation this time.

He rolled over onto his stomach, burying his face in his large feather pillow. Maybe, if he was lucky, he'd suffocate himself in his sleep and he wouldn't have to face his reality. He, Remus John Lupin, was going to be alone. Forever.

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**Please review!**


	3. In Hogsmeade

**Well, here's chapter 3! Please let me know what you think about it. I'm kind of new at the Marauders Era, so let me know if you spy anything that's glaring that I need to change.**

* * *

At Hogwarts, it was policy not to let students roam around in the Forbidden Forest alone at night for fear of Acromantula and other unsavory creatures that might have been lurking in the shadows. Luckily for Remus Lupin, he was one of those unsavory creatures, making him eligible for free roaming capability. James, Sirius, and Peter however, could only pretend to be.

The three snuck along with him during his monthly transformation, keeping him from going stir crazy in the 'Shrieking Shack' as the locals at Hogsmeade liked to call it. They made him less of a mindless, blood-thirsty animal and more of himself, transforming right along with him into their animagi. With each cycle that passed, he realized how invaluable they were to him, making him make the best out of his horrible situation. Before, Remus would be holed up in the Shack, attacking his own body out of sheer frustration, but the Marauders eased that.

At night, thick fog rolled into the wood, making it very difficult to see. Remus couldn't count the number of times he'd stumbled over a tree root or a poorly placed toad stool. The nighttime, however inconvenient, did provide them with the perfect cover to do as they pleased. Usually, they'd spend their night fulfilling his deep need to hunt and kill in a contained way so that nothing of consequence was hurt.

The young wolf lifted his head, taking a the frozen air. Faintly, a scent hit his nose— a deer. He could smell one from a mile away; literally. Without another thought, he burst into a sprint, his nose guiding him like a lantern through the fog. The sound of Padfoot and Prongs close behind him gave him comfort. Even though they never participated in the feast, they stayed close by giving him assurance that he was still ok.

Closing in on the poor animal, Remus picked up on another scent; blood. The thought of something wounding his prey infuriated him, a deep growl imitating from his throat. He picked up his speed, almost losing his friends but increasing his chances of catching the intruder in the act. His feet nearly caught themselves as he broke through low branches in trees and small snow banks, bruising him in places that he would surely discover when he was human again, but were inconsequential at the moment.

To the delight of Prongs, Wormtail, and Padfoot, Remus slowed to a trot, stopping completely as he reached the body of a large doe lying on the ground lifeless, blood spattered on the snow around it. Growls and barks erupted from Remus, anger radiating from him for failing to catch the fiend that took _his _deer. Sirius slowly approached the animal, studying it. Sudden realization hit him, causing him to bark at Remus, grasping his attention. Remus growled lowly at his friend before examining the body that lay before him. Bite marks littered the thing from its neck and onto its stomach, while the only blood that seemed to be left for the deer was found as smudges on the bites. He took in several small sniffs, only to fall back on his haunches, whining. The Marauders sat in stunned silence for a moment, their senses heightened from the threat they all knew was still lingering. A vampire had killed the deer, draining the blood from it. Each of them quickly tossed their heads in different directions, making sure that the monster wasn't still around and waiting.

After the danger seemed to pass, Padfoot looked to Prongs who simply nudged his head to the East. Nodding, Padfoot barked once at Remus before repeating James' gesture. Remus let out another short whine before standing with his friends and following their lead into the misty night.

* * *

Cordelia watched the animals from a tree limb far above the scene. She crouched, leaning against the tree trunk with one arm while the other latched itself to the limb, desperately trying to keep her steady.

The werewolf sniffed around her catch, trying to find some way to retaliate against her for beating him to it, but failed miserably. A victorious smile broke out across her blood stained lips, but was cut short by a sudden ache in her stomach. Since she had only just dazed the deer when she first sensed that the werewolf was approaching, she had to quickly feed. A slight queasiness bubbled in her stomach, making her fight the urge to burp.

After a few moments, the little misfit pack hurried off, leaving Cordelia alone in her tree. She had never seen animal behave in such a way. Predators such as dogs and werewolves would never run in the same crowd as prey like bucks and rats. For that matter, she wasn't even sure that a rat and a stag would ever associate themselves with each other, either.

Cordelia didn't have long to ponder this, the sky around her brightening into a lighter shade of navy, signaling her that her romp in the forest was over. It was time for her to return to assuming her identity as a mild-mannered sixteen-year-old Hogwarts student with no special characteristics whatsoever, except for the fact that she could drain an entire classroom of blood in less than ten minutes.

She drug the back of her hand across her chin, trying to remove some of the dried blood from her earlier kills. What if she didn't wash it off? What if she just strolled into Charms Class, head held high and blood soaked nose in the air?

"Grab your torch and pitch forks." she grumbled, standing erect on the tree limb before free falling down to the moss covered earth, landing with her knees bent and feet sinking into the snow covered ground. Stretching her muscles, her back popped in several places as her arms reached above her head.

She looked over at the dead deer, a twinge of sadness hitting her. It wasn't that she liked killing things; she hated it, actually. Her hunger was just so great that she really couldn't help it. When she was a child, every time she would feed with her father she would sob as she drank, her tears mixing with the crimson liquid in her mouth. Talis would always console her, wrapping his arms around her when they'd finished, whispering to her that the animal was now in Heaven. She didn't know if it was true, but it certainly made her feel better.

As custom dictated, she knelt down beside the animal, closing her eyes for a moment, thanking it for it's sacrifice and praying that it's soul find its way. Opening her eyes again, she ran her hand along the coarse, brown hair on its back.

"Float on." she whispered, "Heaven awaits."

* * *

One thing about the weekends that Cordelia loved the most was the opportunity to wear muggle clothing and lounge until her heart's content. Severus had promised to study with her for their Alchemy test with the contention that she eat breakfast with him.

_"A proper breakfast, Cora." he said, cocking an eyebrow at her, "Not just an apple."_

She loved him for all the worrying he did about her. He was her mother away from Mother.

Pulling on her old pair of blue jeans, she looked at her completed outfit in the full length mirror that stood in the corner of her shared room. With her black 'Beatles' band t-shirt, green and silver cardigan, dark wash jeans, and dark brown boots, she could pass for a muggle teenager, she decided. She tucked her wand in the long inner pocket she made in her cardigan, ran her fingers through her messy hair, and then she was off to see her wizard.

* * *

When she arrived at the Great Hall, Alchemy textbook in hand, Severus was already seated at the table, wearing the same thing he always wore; black button up with black pants. Most Slytherins, Cordelia had noticed over her six years, never really changed from their school clothes into anything casual. They always dressed as though they were attending a funeral or a garden party. What they had against color and comfort, she would never know.

"Good morning, Sev." she smiled, sliding into the seat next to him. He glanced over at her from his _Daily Prophet_ and then back.

"You've seemed awfully cheery this week, Cora."

As much as she wanted to say something about the reason being because she got to consume mass quantities of blood a few evenings prior, she opted to keep her mouth shut and pour herself a goblet of water.

"Anything particularly interesting in the news today?" she asked, dolloping out a spoonful of eggs onto her plate.

"No." Severus said, dully chewing a piece of toast. "Same old Death Eaters. Same old dead muggles."

Cordelia frowned at his lack of sympathy for the muggles. Before her brother was born, she had lived in a muggle neighborhood. Shaking her head, she ridded herself of the thought of those muggle families being murdered, their small houses being torched by vicious Death Eaters.

Carefully, she spooned a small pile of eggs onto a half piece of toast before taking a bite, pushing the thoughts from her mind. She looked over at Severus as he watched her with a revolted look.

"Why can't you just eat your portions separately?"

Swallowing, she shook her head at him, "Life's too short to separate your eggs from your toast, Sev."

Seeming to accept her explanation, Severus returned his nose to the pages of his newspaper, leaving the conversational time behind him. As much as she loved talking to her friend, conversations with Severus never seemed to be long-lived. Maybe that's why he didn't have many friends; he only said what was totally pertinent to the matter at hand and nothing else.

"Cora."

A feminine voice called her name. She turned her head, seeing Eva standing behind her, her hands on her hips and her face twisted into her usual sour expression. Her small posse of Ellen and Martitia Dawes and Winifred Shackleton, stood behind Eva copying her body language. Cordelia always wondered why the girls stuck around Eva. Fear of not fitting in anywhere else? Maybe they secretly did have a deep emotional connection with the pretentious girl.

_"Maybe it's because they're too stupid to know when they're being insulted." _she thought, immediately accepting that conclusion as correct.

"Cora." Eva repeated, her high pitched voice was laced with impatience, "I need you to come to Hogsmeade with us today."

Cordelia looked to Severus, hoping he would shoot down the plans immediately. His attention, however, was still in the political section.

"I'm sorry, Eva." she said, "I'm studying with Severus today. Our Alchemy test-"

Cordelia's sentence was cut short by the frantic waving of Eva's hand in her face.

"Stop, stop, stop." Eva said, taking the seat next to Cordelia, "I need you to come because Malcolm Jones just broke up with his girlfriend."

_Malcolm Jones. _Cordelia rolled her eyes. He was a seventh year Slytherin, captain of the Quidditch team, and the boy Eva had been in lust with ever since she walked in on him naked in the Prefect's bathroom. Every girl in Slytherin, with the exception of Cordelia, vied for his attention and now that Rosalind Bulster, his now ex-girlfriend, was out of the way, the competition was bound to become more intense.

"Right." Cordelia remarked, "What does this have to do with me being in Hogsmeade?"

"Well," Eva began, her tone was that of a mother stating the obvious to a three year old, "He hasn't made plans to go today-"

"And everybody knows he fancies you." Winifred interjected, only to be attacked by Eva.

"Shut it, Winie!" Eva snapped before turn back to the young vampiress, "As I was saying, with you along, he would surely come if I asked him. Then while we're there, you can make some excuse to hurry back to the castle, leaving me alone with him."

"_Why would anyone want to be alone with you?" _Cordelia thought, stopping herself from blurting it out by taking a sip from her goblet.

"Eva, I wish I could help you today, but I really must study." Also, the thought of Malcolm Jones being that close to her made her skin crawl.

Eva's face turned into a look of disbelief. She stood quickly, letting out a howl of frustration. "I hope you know that you're ruining my life!" she screeched, turning everyone in the Hall's attention to the small Slytherin cluster. Without another word, only grunts, Eva turned on her heel and stormed out of the Great Hall, her little posse of nitwits fleeing after her.

"I'm so glad she's gone." Severus' dull voice called out.

Cordelia looked over at him still reading the paper. Her eyebrows knit together as she watched him.

"Loads of help, you were." she grumbled, taking another bite of her egg-covered toast.

She watched as Severus folded up his paper and sit it to the side.

"She's just in shock," he said, sipping from his pumpkin juice, "No one has ever told her 'No' before."

"You know," he began again, "She only wants you around because you're beautiful and she and her little trio possess the looks of a night troll fresh off of winter hibernation."

Cordelia opened her mouth to dismiss his theory, but then closed it, thinking about his words. It was true that Eva Pargass wasn't the most attractive girl in Slytherin house. All of her features were so pointy and sharp that Cordelia was afraid that she would cut herself on her own chin one of these days. Her blonde hair was stick straight and hung flat against her thin shoulders. She was skinny; skinnier than Cordelia who rarely ate solid food, and that was saying something. Winifred was plump and usually had some sort of food stain on her face or stuck in her chin-length brown hair. Having dinner with her, to Cordelia, was like wrestling for air-dropped food in a third world country; fighting to get what you needed, but then learning to live with the disappointment of losing it.

Her cheeks were always red, giving her the appearance of never being able to caught her breath. Whenever they had a class that required them to trek long distances in the forest, Cordelia always expected to see Winifred's body on the way back, lifeless as a result of a heart attack.

Ellen and Martitia were twins, both sharing the same expression of smelling something truly awful. They always dressed alike, pulling their light brown hair back in matching tight ponytails. They were like Eva in the way they appeared; sharp and dangerous to touch.

"And don't try any of that false humility tripe, because you know it's true." Severus finished, taking an apple from the fruit bowl in front of them and biting into it. Cordelia let out a small laugh before finishing off her breakfast.

"I wouldn't dare, Sev."

* * *

The Library was extremely quiet on Saturday; mostly because students waited until Sunday to take a mad dash at finishing their homework on time. The environment was perfect for her and Severus. Madame Pince, the librarian, was off duty for the morning, giving them free reign over their sanctum.

"You're making this more difficult than it actually is, Cora." Severus sighed, running his hand through his long hair. "Again, what is the basic flow of Alchemy?"

Cordelia rested her chin on her folded arms, squeezing her eyes shut, hoping that the action would help her remember. Suddenly, as if struck by lightening, the answer came to her. Excitedly, she stood.

"Comprehension, deconstruction, and reconstruction!" she said loudly. Severus smiled.

"Congratulations, Miss Leonova. You've just gotten the first three questions on your Alchemy exam correct."

"Well, well, well, if it isn't my favorite Slytherin and ole Sour Grape." a familiar voice called from beside them. Simultaneously, the pair looked over to see Sirius Black standing with James, Remus, and Peter beside him. Cordelia's face broke out in a smile while Severus' could only do the opposite.

Cordelia rolled her eyes, "His name is Severus, Black." _Boys._

She hadn't seen Remus in almost two weeks. Eyeing him, she noticed that he looked thinner than usual, his eyes with dark circles underneath them. The fact that he wouldn't make eye contact with her made her stomach lurch in nervousness.

"Say," Sirius caught her attention again, "We're headed into Hogsmeade today and we wanted to see if you would like to come."

"I would," she started, glancing over at Severus who was clearly just wishing that the encounter would end, "But I'm studying with Severus today."

"Oh come on, Leonova," Black groaned, leaning down so that he could lean his elbows on the wooden desk, "We'll have you back in plenty of time to study."

Cordelia looked from Sirius to Severus and then back again, conflicting feelings causing her to bite her lip. "Well…"

"You're breaking my heart, Miss Leonova." Black held his hand over his heart, pretending to be wounded, "You don't want to do that, do you?"

Cordelia giggled. Sirius Black was very charming, she'd give him that. No wonder the Gryffindor girls loved him so much.

She sighed, closing the text book that lay in front of her, "Well, I guess not."

Straightening up quickly, Sirius clapped his hand together, "Brilliant."

"Do you want to go too, Sev?" Cora asked, looking to her friend who was rueing from his side of the table. Severus glanced at the Marauders, Sirius Black glaring at him with a look that said 'You'll wish you were never born if you come along.'

"Actually," he sighed, leaning back in his chair, "I do have to prepare for a dinner party that Professor Slughorn is throwing tonight."

"Another party so soon?" Cordelia asked, "I thought he just threw one last week?"

Severus gathered his books in a pile and stood, tucking them underneath one arm, "You know Slughorn, he just loves to entertain."

"Oh too bad, Sev." James said, his voice holding no sympathy, "Guess we won't be seeing you at Hogsmeade today."

Severus just rolled his eyes before turning to Cordelia. "It's going to snow again today; wear a coat."

His mother hen tendency was rearing its head, causing her to smile warmly at him. Had she mentioned that she loved when he worried about her?

"What would I do without you, Sev?"

He threw a small smile back at her, "Oh, probably die of hypothermia."

* * *

Extreme weather didn't effect Cordelia in the slightest. She would have much rather just gone to the small village wearing a t-shirt, but in two degree weather, it would look a tiny bit suspicious if she hadn't gone back to her room to fetch her coat and mittens. The only thing she couldn't take much of was direct sunlight. Since her skin lacked almost any pigment, the harsh rays burned her— quickly. She had a scar on her shoulder from running outside naked as a toddler, only collapse in a wailing, sizzling mess. That was the day that her mother started carrying an umbrella around with her at all times.

The overcast was perfect, giving her just enough leeway to not have to wear her hood up. She really didn't go many places outside of the Forbidden Forest and the castle, so the trip was a real treat for her.

Sirius and James commanded her attention the entire way there, telling her all about the secret places in the village that they'd discovered, something about a secret passage way. Every now and then, she would look back to Remus only to see him staring at the ground in front of him as he walked. Disappointment crawled up her throat, forcing her to swallow it again and again. Was he angry at her? Had she done something to offend him?

"Did you know that there are vampires in the Forbidden Forest?"

That caught her full attention. She looked at the boys on either side of her, trying to pass off her look of concern as genuine surprise at the news and not a threat that she had been found out.

"O-oh? How do you know?" she stammered, her eyes widening. Sirius opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by James smacking him behind Cora's back, causing him to rub his wounded arm shoulder and growl.

James took over for him, shrugging, "Just a rumor."

Potter and Black packed her afternoon full of visits to Honeyduke's candy shop, the Three Broomsticks, and the playing of games they had invented which involved snowballs and unsuspecting Slytherin students. She, of course, protested the game at first, but after seeing how much fun the boys had, decided to indulge herself pegging Regulus Black squarely in the back of the head.

"Nice shot, old girl!" James exclaimed, laughing as the younger Black looked around furiously for the culprit.

"Twenty points to Miss Leonova!" Sirius shouted, hurling another frozen ball at his brother. Seeing the ball hit Rudolphus Lestrange instead, Cordelia burst out laughing, jumping onto Sirius' back, hugging his neck in celebration.

"One million points to Mister Black!" she cried as he spun her around, ultimately slinging her into a soft snow bank. She lay in the plush snow for a few moments, catching her breath and enjoying the rest. Closing her eyes, she listened to the sounds of the bustling village. People moved all around her, weaving in and out of shops, chatting and laughing amongst themselves. Her had been just about perfect, but something nagged at her through every activity James and Sirius dragged her along to. _Remus_. He had stood in the background all day long, not speaking to her, not looking at her. He simply quietly chatted with Peter while the three of them laughed loudly, disrupting the noise level of the village.

"Cordelia."

Opening her eyes, she saw the source of the familiar voice. He stood over her, one hand outstretched to her and the other in his pocket. Smiling, she took the gloved hand. Remus pulled her up forcefully, causing her to crash into him. He still didn't look at her as he muttered a 'Sorry.'

Cordelia sighed, sadness filling her, "It's alright, Remus."

She saw James sneak a peek at his wrist watch, a gleeful smile sprawling across his face.

"It's almost time for Lily to be finished. She's been tutoring first years all day long, so I think I'll just go help her unwind."

Sirius let out a whistle, winking at his friend, who simply laughed in response.

"Not like that, ya git."

Black looped his arm around Peter's neck, pulling the shorter boy into the crook of his arm. "Come on, Wormtail. Let's help James find his way back to the castle."

Before Cordelia could manage a 'goodbye' the trio were gone, swiftly headed back to the school. A tension crawled up Cora's spine as she realized that she was left alone with Remus. She turned on her heel, only to come face to face with him. He finally looked her in the eye, but she could only see despair in his.

He cleared his throat, not that it did any good. His voice still came out low and soft. "Do you want to see something?"

* * *

**Please ****review! **


	4. In the Shrieking Shack

**This was a difficult chapter to write, I hope you know. It wasn't even what I'd planned, but it just happened like this. I hope ya'll enjoy.**

* * *

A new barbed wire fence stood about a Quidditch field length perimeter around the Shrieking Shack. Remus and Cordelia stood against the fence, gazing at the old structure as it swayed dangerously in the nonexistent wind. She had no idea why he had brought her here and it appeared as though he wasn't going to tell her, seeing as he had only spoken eight words to her the entire day.

"Are you angry with me?" she asked, turning to him. A look of horror overtook him.

"Of course, not." he said, his voice returning to its usual timber.

"Then why haven't you said anything to me all day? You wouldn't even look at me!" Small tears pricked at the corners of her eyes. All of her impatience with him had spilled out accidentally. Crossing her arms, she huffed quietly, waiting for his answer.

"Cordelia." he began, pausing for a minute to search his vocabulary for words to explain himself, "I'm not sure if I can continue with this."

Her heart broke, but her face was solid as a stone.

"Continue with what?" she asked softly, kicking her a small snow pile with her foot, "Being my friend?"

She watched as Remus glared at her, knowing that she was playing stupid on purpose.

"Sod it!" He cried. The volume of his voice took her off guard, causing her to flinch. He noticed her reaction, guilt welling up in him.

"I'm sorry." his voice was softer, "Cordelia, I have feelings for you."

Cordelia tried to smile, but just couldn't. The happiest moment in all of her schooling at Hogwarts and she couldn't bear to smile. The tone of his words were that of conclusion, not beginning.

Remus watched her, holding himself back from rushing her into his arms and holding her close. He had caused the pained looked on her face. Suddenly he'd wished they'd never met so she didn't have to go through this torture; being happy with some other guy that could open up to her fully and didn't have a condition like his.

"I have this problem.…" he started, but trailed off in the middle, shaking his head. "I'm just too different from the others."

Anger quickly replaced sadness in Cora's mind. She closed the gap between them, looking up at him.

"Of course you are, Remus." she growled, "Do you think I _want_ any other guy at this school?"

Not giving him any chance to respond, she continued on, "No. I like you because you _are_ different."

She felt Remus' hands grasp her forearms tightly, gritting his teeth as her anger quickly developed in him as well.

"You don't understand!" he snarled. That was it. All of the pain for five years had come to a head and released itself on the object of his obsession; the girl that had caused it all. Why did he think he could do this?

Taking a deep breath, he let go of his anger, replacing it with hopelessness. All of his energy left his body, leaving him exhausted. He leaned down, resting his forehead on hers, his eyes closed.

Cordelia held him, closing her eyes, listening to his soft whimpers. His hot breath hit her lips, sending shivers up her spine. She took in his scent of deep pine and chocolate.

Opening her eyes, she noticed the scars that ran diagonally across his face. In the natural light, they looked deeper than when she saw them inside the school. The long imperfections seemed painful, even though they had obviously been healed for some time.

"Remus." she whispered, his eyes remained closed. "Take me to the Shrieking Shack."

* * *

The inside of the old building was even more tragic than the outside. The pair made their way slowly, trying not to make any false moves that would send them crashing through the floor. Remus held her hand, guiding her up a staircase, pointing out broken steps and pieces of wood that jutted out from the wall.

"Careful." he would mutter, "Watch this here."

At the top of the stairs sat a bedroom, the door ripped from the hinges. Cordelia stepped around Remus, taking in the room that looked like a hurricane had victimized it. Deep scratches in the wood of the floor and walls littered the place.

"What happened?" she asked rhetorically. She bent down, running her hand over one of the grooves of the scarred wood. "This poor animal."

Remus stood in the doorway, shame written on his face. He watched her move about the room, examining every place he'd wrecked; every spot his claws had touched, so did she. His heart broke at the look of awe and horror on her face. He wanted to die, kill himself right then and there rather than tell her the truth.

"Cordelia," he said softly, "I think I should take you back to the castle."

She quickly whipped around, as if she had forgotten that he was still in the room. He followed her movements as she slowly walked to him, stopping directly in front. Her dark eyes locked with his, knocking the breath out of him. Could he really just walk away from her? Every time she looked at him, he felt as though he was actually human; completely normal. Could he really go the rest of his life without moments like this, where her mere presence sent him into a simultaneous state of euphoria and despair?

"Remus." her hand found its way onto his chest, "Please don't push me away."

There she was. Begging _him_ to accept _her._ She leaned up, eliminating the space between them, pressing her cool lips into his. Every piece of his being screamed for him to grab her, take her into his arms and kiss her back. Suddenly he'd felt as though he'd received a Dementor's kiss; as her lips left his, all his happiness went right along with them.

He looked down at the girl he had just rejected, the back of her hand flew up, covering her mouth. Her eyes fluttered, tears dripping down only to be collected on the back of her mitten. He wanted to cry right along with her, scratch that, he wanted to die knowing that he'd broken her heart.

"I think," he said, trying to steady his wavering voice, "I should take you back to the castle."

* * *

Cordelia stayed in her room for the most part of the week, claiming illness was keeping her from being productive. When she wasn't tossing and turning in restless sleep, she was sobbing into her pillow. By Thursday night, however, her head hurt too much to cry anymore and by Friday morning, Severus was seriously considering dragging her from her room in her pajamas and forcing her into class. She skipped meals all week, too embarrassed to show her face with Remus and his friends around. Severus snuck her food, almost having to hold her down and feed her.

_"__You're going to kill yourself if you don't stop this behavior." he would say, trying to rip her covers away yet again and pull her out of her wallowing, "The only things that are going to be around to notice are the rats!"_

By Friday, she summoned the energy, and also the concern that Severus might actually make good on his threats, to rise, take a shower, and follow her fellow students to class.

In Alchemy, she could barely pay attention to her test. Every so often, tears would leak down her face, staining the parchment and smudging the questions Professor Ripplestone had laid out for them. After thirty minutes of staring down at it, Cordelia gathered her test and handed it back to the professor, apologizing before quickly exiting the room.

The girl's lavatory was completely empty; Cordelia made sure of it. Dropping her bag beside one of the many sinks in the middle of the room, she ran the water, splashing it on her face. She covered her puffy eyes with her hands, leaning her elbows on either side of the porcelain.

"Pull yourself together." she groaned, replacing her elbow with her hands and glaring at herself in the mirror. A surge of emotion ran through her; anger at herself, Remus, and all of the people she had ever come in contact with.

"You're better than this, Leonova." she growled, gripping the tile sink. "Just get your shit together."

Her grip tightened on the sink, until she heard a loud _crack_ and pulled back pieces of grey tile. Highly emotional situations weren't her most shining hours. She always lost control of everything. Her strength would peak, her blood lust would increase, her behavior would become irrational.

_"__In control."_ she reminded herself,_ "Just stay in control."_

That's it. She would just have to stay in complete emotional lock down for around… a year and a half more. Easy fucking peasy.

When a Hufflepuff student scampered into the toilets, Cordelia took it as her cue to leave, abandoning her broken sink and the little Puff with a very confused look on her face. She slung her bag over her shoulder and hurried out the wide open door, only to come in contact with something very solid.

Looking up, she saw Sirius Black standing right in front of her. Immediately her eyes flew to the floor, muttering an apology before attempting to shuffle around him.

"Wait, Leonova." he called, his hand rushing to her forearm. She made eye contact with him, sighing deeply.

"What is it, Black?"

Sirius shifted uncomfortably, his eyes darting around the corridor.

"Listen," he began, clearing his throat and releasing her arm. "I just… Look, Moony does have problems, but what he did to you was shit and I'm sorry about it."

Tears threatened to fall, but she refused to let them. She took in a deep breath before replying, "He led me on, Sirius. What he did was more than shit."

He ran his hand through his curly hair, shaking his head. "He didn't lead you on. You just don't understand."

Cordelia stomped her foot like a child throwing a tantrum, crossing her arms across her chest. "I wish you all would stop saying that." she said breathlessly.

"He really does care for you." he replied.

Cordelia cared for him. The one person that made her feel like she could be at least semi-normal with a semi-normal love life; he was gone.

"He has a strange way of showing it." she said. Sirius closed in on her, pulling her into his chest, her head resting in the crook of his neck. Cordelia was stunned. She had never seen him act this way before. Even the devil-may-care, playboy Sirius Black had a softer side. The only thing she could do was return his gesture, feeling his hand rub her back slowly.

"I'm sorry, Cora."

* * *

"I failed my test."

Severus had found Cordelia draped on a couch in the Slytherin common room at the end of the day, reading some book that was assigned in her Care of Magical Creatures class. He frowned deeply at her as she stared at the book, not looking up at him.

"That's because you ran out half way through the class." he replied. "I was worried sick, Cora."

As she finally looked up at him, he could see her were red and raw. A scowl formed across his face.

"What did they do to you?"

She mustered a smile, reaching out and taking his hand. He knelt down in front of her, brushing a stray black strand that fell out of place back lightly with his fingertips. Feeling helpless, he turned and sat cross legged, his back leaning on the couch. There was nothing he could do but sit and sigh, wishing he could fix every hurt feeling for her.

The two sat in silence. He didn't want to press the issue, knowing the wound was still fresh and she didn't want to try and mend it just yet. Maybe she was deranged, but the pain she felt was sort of comforting. It was the last thing Remus had given her; she wanted to hold on just a little longer. She lay her head on the seat of the couch and slid one hand onto Severus' shoulder.

"Is it weird to not want the pain to end?" she whispered, rubbing her thumb over a bit of exposed skin on his neck. Taking her hand, he brought it to his lips, placing a small kiss on her palm.

"Not at all."

A light laugh escaped from her. Silence claimed the pair again as they watched the grand fireplace glow in the corner of the dimly lit room. Dark blobs appeared by the windows only to disappear as quickly as they came. Cordelia loved to guess what type of fish was swimming by the window based on the silhouette and sometimes, when no one was in the common room, would cup her hands around her eyes and press them to the glass, trying to see if she could see the little creatures.

"That's one of the tentacles of the Giant Squid." Severus said, pointing at the greenish window. Cordelia rolled her eyes.

"There's no such thing as a Giant Squid, Sev. They just tell us that so we won't go swimming unsupervised."

"Oh no, Cora. I heard it ate one of the Hufflepuff first years."

She thought for a moment, rolling onto her back and lacing her fingers behind her head. "Hmm." she said, biting her lip before it turned up into a smile. "Not much of a loss really."

Laughter rang out through the empty room; not something that the Slytherin common room heard all of the time. Severus wiped small tears that had formed on his eyelashes as he laughed, while Cordelia caught her breath.

When the laughter subsided, the two continued to watch the fire, moods lifted slightly higher.

"Severus," Cordelia said, the light of the fire flickering on her pale skin causing shadows to dance across her body. "Thank you."

* * *

Sirius sat on his bed, arms crossed as he watched Remus finish his nighttime routine and cover himself with his thick blanket. Remus hadn't spoken since he'd arrived in the room that night, but he was definitely about to.

"I saw Cora today."

James threw Sirius a look of exhaustion, "Com'on, Pads. Give the poor guy a break."

Sirius stood from his bed, looming over Remus, watching his back as he tried to ignore him.

"She was still upset today, Remus." he growled, "It's been almost a week and she's still upset."

Remus continued to ignore him, not moving a muscle from his bed. Sirius drew closer to him.

"You know, when you told us that night what you had done, I thought you were loony for letting someone as gorgeous as Cora go. Now, I think all of those months of dealing with your problem has given you brain damage and you might be slightly retarded."

"Sirius-!" James called, but it was too late. Remus exploded from his bed. Sirius barely had time to react before Remus balled his night shirt into his fists and threw him against the bedpost.

"It was for her own good!" The young werewolf's voice came out in a rasp. Sirius thrashed against him, only to find out that he wasn't as strong as Anger-Fuelled Remus was.

"How do you know, Remus?" Sirius snarled back, finally able to break free from him. He grappled him into a headlock, putting his mouth right next to his ear. "You don't know! You took away her choice in the matter!"

Remus struggled to free himself, clawing at his friend's clothing. "She would have chosen wrong!"

Sirius let him go, shoving back to his own bed. "She would have chosen you."

The rest of the night was served out in complete silence. The Marauders crawled into bed, Sirius and Remus turning to face opposite directions from each other. James sighed, gazing up at the top of his canopy but barely able to see it in the darkness. Placing his glasses on his bedside table, he lay on his back, thinking. He felt sorry for Remus. He knew that his friend felt like he didn't deserve love; he didn't deserve true happiness. He knew that Remus did love Cora, but he didn't want to ruin her happiness.

"Good night." he sighed, only to have silence return to him. Rolling onto his side, he closed his eyes, trying to shake the thoughts that must've been running through Remus' mind constantly. _"One day." _he thought, drifting off into slumber, _"One day you'll be tired of being alone. You better pray that Cora is around for that day."_

* * *

**Please review, I really enjoy hearing what you think. **


	5. In the Hospital Wing

**Thank you guys for reading! I love hearing your reactions to the story, so please keep sending your thoughts to me! I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

* * *

It was well known throughout Hogwarts that seventh year Slytherins threw the best party of the year right before Christmas break. It was also known that if you were invited, it would be the most fun you'd ever had at Hogwarts in your entire time of being there. In a secret room of the castle, the students would meet, music bouncing off of the sound-proof walls and bottles of fire whisky being passed around like offering plates.

Cordelia, not being a partier herself, had gone for the past two years and hated every moment of it. This year, she decided, she'd stay home.

"Leonova." a deep voice called to her, causing her to look up from her side of the dining table. A tall boy with brilliant blonde hair and deep green eyes sat before her, flashing a smile. _Malcolm Jones. _Inwardly she rolled her eyes. He usually stayed away from her when Severus was around, but today it was her misfortune to arrive at breakfast before him.

"Yes, Jones?" she asked, her voice as flat and dull as she could make it.

His hand reached over the table and rested on top of hers. The gesture made Cordelia want to retract her hand quickly and make a run from the the Great Hall to the showers, but she stayed still as a statue. Her eyes flickered from their hands to his smirking face.

"Listen, Leonova." Malcolm started, leaning toward her. "Why don't I take you to the party this year?"

"Because, Jones, I'm not attending this year."

Malcolm laughed as though she was kidding. He smiled back at her, his hand moving up her arm, pushing her robe sleeve up as well.

"Oh, come on, Leonova," his thumb made small circles on her forearm, "It's my last year. Why don't you make it special for me?"

Ripping her arm away from the older Slytherin, Cordelia returned to her eggs. "Why don't you ask Eva Pargass to make your last year special?"

Malcolm's face fell into a scowl, realizing that he was being turned down. "Fuck Eva Pargass." he growled. Cordelia stood, shoving her books into her brown leather book bag. She glared over at Jones.

"Yes, I'm sure you will." she said, turning away from him, "Good day, Jones."

She could feel multiple sets of eyes follow her as she left the Hall. Looking back, someone caught her eye. Eva with her group of cronies, a look of marred anger slapped across her face. Cordelia smiled back at her, accompanying it with a wink.

She was sure that there would be some sort of backlash from Eva, but really, she couldn't manage the willpower to care.

* * *

Maybe it was the fact that she had been too depressed to hunt, or the fact that she had been stressing out over her grade in Alchemy in weeks after she had failed her test, but, as Potions class rolled around that day, Cordelia was extremely dehydrated. Her head spun, a dry, sandpaper-like feeling taking over her mouth and throat. Coughing, she tried to ease her discomfort, but only seemed to make it worse. In vain, she thought that she could drink enough water, eat enough meat, to buy her more time until she could get herself together enough to go to the Forbidden Forest. The food only hurt her, weighing her down and making her feel more heavy, but she ignored the feeling— and now it was too late.

_"__Two classes, Cordelia."_ she tried to comfort herself, _"Just two classes after this and then you can eat."_

She walked through the stone doorway of her classroom, seeing work stations instead of desks. Cordelia inwardly sighed with relief. To her, working with her hands instead of taking notes made the class go by faster, giving her mind a chance to focus on something besides her severe thirst.

Looking over at her usual work station, she saw Martitia standing next to Eva, both sharing an identical glare. _"Oh yea," _she thought, _"I forgot about that. Looks like I didn't think it all the way through this morning when I publicly burned her. Whoops."_

She tapped her fingers on her notebook, watching every person in the class pair off, two by two.

"Miss, Leonova." a familiar shout came from the front of the room. Professor Vander stood, her hands on her hips, glaring at her. "Why is it that every time I wish to start class, you're out of place?"

"Forgive me, Professor. I haven't a partner."

"Well," Vander out on a fake wide smile, gesturing to her right, "Looks as though you're in luck. Mister Lupin here is in need of a partner as well."

_What._

Cordelia's heart stopped. A cold shiver ran down her back as she realized that she would be with Remus for the next hour and a half. In close proximity. Sharing tools. Bumping into each other accidentally.

"Well, Miss Leonova?" Vander was growing impatient and it would only be a matter of time before she started intentionally raising her voice.

Taking a deep breath, Cordelia walked to Remus' station, neither of looking at the other.

"Where's Peter?" she grumbled quietly, pulling her textbook from her bag and readying for class to begin.

"Flu." Remus replied, copying her, making sure to keep his distance. He glanced over to her, stealing a small peak at her face. A smile crept across his lips as he saw her tap her finger on her top lip, deep in thought. He loved it when she did that. She brushed her hair behind her ear, tossing it over her shoulder, revealing her pale neck. The feeling of touching her cool skin immediately jumped to the front of his mind, sending a compulsion through him to reach out and run his fingers across it.

"Lupin." she said. Her voice was completely professional with no hint of camaraderie. It stung him that she used his last name, as if she was speaking to a total stranger. "May I borrow a sheet of parchment?"

They didn't speak much during their process. Remus watched her as she moved, flinching away every time he would venture too close to her. Her body language told him that she hadn't quiet forgiven him yet. That was alright with him; he still hadn't forgiven himself either.

Picking up his knife, he set to work on chopping the large hunk of dark meat in front of him. He had read what it was, but really he didn't care. His eyes wandered over to his partner again, watching her blow softly on the bud of a flower that had not yet bloomed. By her third blow, the small bud had begun to open itself, and then, by the fifth, it was fully awake, showing it's lovely face to hers. Smiling slightly, she picked it up, dropping it into the boiling mixture in their cauldron.

The memory of her lips on his hit him. Her breath was so warm. Her lips were so soft. _Oh God, why?_

"Ah!"

A sharp pain stung his palm, causing him to drop his knife. Looking down he could see a deep slash, blood seeping out slowly. Cordelia had turned immediately when he cried out, worry on her face.

"Remus are you-?" She stopped short. The werewolf looked up at her, half excited that she'd used his first name and half cursing himself for not paying more attention to what he had been doing.

It was the smell that had hit her first before her eyes travelled down to his left hand that he was clutching with his right. Her mouth watered involuntarily, but she clamped her teeth tightly, not wanting to lose control of herself. She could feel her muscles tense up, preparing to attack as though Remus was a wounded animal in front of her. Her hand flew to her nose, trying to block the smell of the sweet crimson as it dripped from the pool in his hand onto the chilled stone floor.

"Are you alright, Cordelia?" Remus asked, taking a step closer to her, only to have her stumble back away from him.

Unable to hold her breath any longer, she inhaled deeply, the full force of the scent hitting her like a train. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head at the sheer pleasure of his smell.

"Oh God, Remus. Stop." she moaned, a sensual overtone filling her voice.

He wouldn't lie. Remus loved the way she had said his name. He clenched his jaw, fighting the urge to make her say it again.

"I have to go to the infirmary." Cordelia mumbled. She looked from Remus' hand to Professor Vander, then bolted from the classroom.

The professor walked over to Remus, eyeing his hand and placing a rag underneath it so that the blood would drip on it instead of the floor.

"You better head that way too, Lupin. And, while you're there, check on Miss Leonova, will you?"

The boy simply nodded, adjusting the rag. He made his way to the infirmary quickly, making sure he didn't leave a trail of blood as he went.

* * *

How could she have been so stupid? Guilt rushed with her as she sprinted to the Hospital Wing. Remus could have been dead; dead at her hand. God only knows what would have happened if she had waited only one more day. Tears blurred her vision as she ran, causing her to bump into a few students. A couple yelled profanity after her, but the loud roaring in her ears made it hard for her to hear it.

_"__Stupid girl!" _she inwardly, _"Stupid, foolish girl!"_

By the time Cordelia reached Madame Pomfrey, she was completely out of breath from running the entire way. She burst into the infirmary, running to the elder witch, gasping for air. Madame Pomfrey calmly sat her on one of the hospital beds, making her lie down. A mixture of her dehydration and the lack of oxygen caused her to claw at the woman's arms, panic escaping her.

"Tell me what the problem is, Miss Leonova." she said, her hands on either side of the girl's red face, wiping away stay tears with her thumb.

"I need-" Cordelia coughed then drew in a ragged breath, "I need-"

"She needs blood."

An authoritative voice rang from the doorway. The two witches looked over to see Professor Dumbledore briskly walking toward them.

"Blood?" Madame Pomfrey's face held a look of disbelief. "Are you saying-?"

"Yes." Dumbledore nodded his head, looking down at the young vampiress writhing in anguish on the bed. "Miss Leonova is a vampire."

Without another word the nurse hurried behind a screen, returning with a dusty, maroon, short-necked bottle and a goblet. Popping the cork off, she tipped the bottle up, filling the large goblet halfway.

"Drink this, dear." she said, pushing the rim to the girl's lips and tilting it back, filling her mouth with the thick liquid. It tasted like blood, to her, but they couldn't just have a bottle of blood sitting around in the infirmary, could they? After a few deep gulps, she lifted Cordelia's hands to the goblet, letting her hold it herself. "That's a good girl."

Minutes passed and Cordelia's breathing returned to normal as she sipped from the cup. Dumbledore simply stood over her bed, his hands behind his back as he watched her.

"I thought we had an agreement, Miss Leonova." he started, cocking his eyebrow at her, "This could have been a tremendous incident."

"How did you know I was here?" Cordelia asked, her eyes fixed on the contents of her cup, not wanting to see her Headmaster's disapproving stare.

"You haven't checked in with me in a few weeks now, Cordelia." he said, "I knew it was only a matter of time before you wound up here. You're old enough to know when you need to hunt. I shouldn't have to babysit you anymore."

"Please don't tell my father."

Dumbledore sighed, taking a seat on the side of her bed, running his hand over his long beard in thought. "This is the first time in six years that this has happened. It is only because of that fact that I am not going to tell him."

Joy sprang up in Cordelia, leaking onto her face, causing a giant smile. "Thank you, sir."

She couldn't even imagine the kind of reaction her father would have if he had known she had skipped hunting for so long.

"Sir." she said, looking up at him, "I'm sorry I put so many people in danger."

The older man simply nodded, "I know you are, Miss Leonova."

The two sat in silence for a moment before Dumbledore let out a light chuckle.

"You know, I knew your mother. She was a Gryffindor during my first year as headmaster."

Cordelia sat up on her elbows, her face covered with disbelief.

"Really?"

"Oh yes." Said Dumbledore, a twinkling memory in his eye, "I remember how she climbed to the top of one of the bell towers in her seventh year. The very top. A very adventurous girl, she was."

Cordelia laughed slightly, draining her cup of the rest of the liquid. "You're telling me."

Dumbledore shared her laugh before standing and walking toward the door. "Just rest here for a while. I'll inform your Professors that you won't be attending classes this afternoon. Tonight, however, I'm giving you explicit orders to visit the Forbidden Forest."

Cordelia smiled after him, "Yes sir."

She watched as he walked through the door, lying back on the plush bed. The excitement of nearly killing someone she cared for had hit her all at once. As soon as her head hit her pillow, sleep overtook her, sending her into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

Remus stood outside the door of the infirmary, his rag beginning to over flow with blood. He budged the door with his other hand, cracking it slightly.

"Miss Leonova is a vampire." Dumbledore's voice sounded from inside.

His body went ridged. Surely he couldn't have heard that correctly. He shook his head in disbelief. Cordelia wasn't a vampire. She ate regular food. She was awake during the day. She slept in a bed and not a coffin. Admittedly, Remus didn't really know much about vampires.

He listened to the rest of their conversation. Dumbledore had known that she was… the way she was, just like he knew the way Remus was.

"You're old enough to know when to hunt."

He was turning her loose in the Forbidden Forest just as he was with Remus.

Suddenly, wires connected in his mind. _She_ was the one that had killed the deer in the forest. She was the vampire that Sirius couldn't shut up about hunting for.

Guilt washed over him. He thought about her predicament and his own. They weren't so different, after all. That's why he wanted her so badly. They both lived with secrets that they could never really reveal to others. Remus was lucky enough to find James, Peter, and Sirius, but who did Cordelia have? Snivellous Snape?

He wanted to burst through the doors and tell her that he knew; tell her about him. How would she react? He had hurt her so badly. Would it only push her farther away from him?

His inner battle ceased as the door in front of him opened and Professor Dumbledore glanced down at him.

"Good day, Mr. Lupin." he said cheerfully, before walking past. "You might want to get that hand looked at."

Turning his head, Remus watched Dumbledore walk down the hallway, ultimately disappearing around the corner.

Remus slowly entered the doorway, spying Madame Pomfrey who was waving to him, signaling for him to be quiet. He nodded, approaching her. She took his hand and examined the injury.

"That's a nasty cut, Mr. Lupin." The mediwitch whispered, releasing his hand and making her way back behind the screen that separated the rest of the room from her medical supplies. She reappeared with a small green bottle, pulling out a small dropper, she let a few drops fall on his wound. A slight burning sensation spread through his entire hand, causing him to wince. He watched as the cut sealed up, not exactly healing, but the bleeding had stopped.

"There you are, young man." she said, wrapping a few strips of gauze around his palm. "You may head back to class now."

Remus quietly thanked her, turning to leave. He glanced over at the sleeping vampire; she still looked incredibly beautiful to him, even in slumber.

She was undoubtedly the only girl he'd ever met that could truly understand what he went through. He let out an audible sigh at the thought.

_"__You, Remus John Lupin," _he thought, running his hand through his hair, _"Truly have shit for brains."_

* * *

Madame Pomfrey had woken Cordelia up as night fell.

"Are you sure, you'll be alright out there, dear?" the older witch wrung her hands, glancing out the window at the fading light.

Cordelia laughed quietly, smiling at her. "Madame, I've been doing it for my entire life."

"Right." Madame Pomfrey replied, as she lit the candle beside Cordelia's bed. "Just be safe."

The girl thanked her, gathering her bag that had been brought to her from Professor Vander's classroom. She stood and straightened her uniform, pushing her tie back in place and smoothing out her skirt.

"Good night, Ma'am." She called, walking through the door. The woman reciprocated, returning to her nightly duties.

The corridors were nearly empty as Cordelia made her way toward the dungeon. She couldn't wait to change clothes and get into the forest to work off all of the energy she had pent up. It was very freeing, being able to leave the castle when she wanted. Up until her third year, Dumbledore had her on a feeding schedule. He would accompany her to the woods, studying her as she fed, making sure she was unharmed, but also not a threat to anyone else. At the end of the night, they would sit and watch the moon fall behind the mountains, prompting the sun to begin its ascension into the sky. She missed those times. Maybe she should ask him to join her again.

"I saw you with Malcolm."

Eva's high-pitched voice was so easily recognizable that Cordelia didn't have to turn to see who was talking to her.

"I turned him down, Eva." she sighed, turning to face the four girls glaring at her, Martitia and Ellen identically crossing their arms while Winifred and Eva posed with their hands on their hips.

"Also," Eva began again, ignoring her, "I saw you at Hogsmeade the exact day you said that you were too busy studying."

Cordelia flinched. She _had_ gone to the village with Remus and his friends after telling Eva she couldn't go.

Eva walked toward her, her lips pursed in a deep frown. "If you weren't so busy fucking around with your dirty little mudblood boyfriend and the traitor Black, Malcolm would be snogging me at this very moment."

Anger welled up inside Cordelia. Remus' blood status never mattered to her and neither did the fact that Sirius' allegiance didn't lie with the 'Dark Lord' that every one in Slytherin whispered about constantly. Her parents hated Voldemort, saying that people like him set the magical community back to the Middle Ages. She was inclined to agree with them.

"Don't you call him that." she growled. Eva closed the gap between them, a smirk forming on her thin lips.

"Did I hit a nerve, Cora?" Eva sounded amused, making Cordelia's blood boil, "Maybe your filthy, muggle boyfriend could make you feel all better."

"Just leave me alone, Eva." Cordelia said, taking a deep breath. As she turned to leave, she felt hands on her back and then the cold stone floor hit her cheek. A sharp pain throbbed in her cheek as she reached up for it, running her fingertips over it gently.

By now, a small crowd of leftover students that hung around in the hallways had gathered around them, watching to see if the fight would escalate.

Cordelia turned over into her elbow, looking back at the girls from her house. Winifred laughed loudly with Ellen and Martitia while Eva towered above Cordelia, a triumphant smile on her face.

Cordelia pulled herself off the ground quickly, making space between her and her aggressor, but Eva was having none of it. Apparently, the encouraging laughter of her cronies had given her the bravery of a Gryffindor. She walked to Cordelia, shoving her again.

"Stop it, Eva!" Cordelia warned, steadying herself after each push. The girl ignored her, giving her one final shove into the stone wall, knocking the back of Cordelia's head against it.

"Or what, Loenova?" Eva laughed, holding her onto the wall by her shoulders. "Are you going to call your Gryffindors to come save you? You're a disgrace to our house, Cordelia. Filthy muggle lover!"

That was it. Cordelia had heard enough. With one motion, her hands were on Eva's shoulders, roughly pushing her away. It was only until she saw that Eva was on the other side of the hall on the ground and everyone that had gathered to watch their fight shared the same look of horror, that she realized how hard she had actually pushed Eva. She watched as the girl gingerly touched the back of her head, pulling it back to find a large blood spot on her hand.

A shriek came from Eva that emanated throughout the entire corridor. Winifred had turned ghostly white before quickly waddling down the hallway to the Slytherin common room. Ellen and Martitia simply watched Cordelia in terror, backing away from her, along with all the other students.

Eva continued shrieking, tears dripping from her pointed chin. Cordelia could smell the blood that was gushing from the back of her head; it was a lot.

Professor McGonagall was the first teacher to arrive, running to Eva and frantically asking what was wrong. Eva could only sob, showing her the blood on her hand that she had gotten from the gash on her head. One by one, more and more teachers appeared, Dumbledore being the last.

"What happened, Miss Pargass?" He asked, leaning down to her and putting his hand on her shoulder. By the time of his arrival, Eva had pulled herself together enough to point at Cordelia.

"She did it!" Eva's screech was piercing, "She's a freak!"

* * *

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	6. In the Headmaster's Office

**So, here we are. The next chapter will get into the PoA era, so that's something to look forward to. I hope y'all enjoy! Love ya!**

**-Gren**

* * *

Ramona Treefoil, now Ramona Leonova, is a beautiful, strong willed woman. She worked for the Beast and Being divisions of the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures in the Ministry of Magic and was the first woman to ever successfully penetrated and live among a tribe of Siberian vampires. She had carried and delivered two half human, half vampire children and, by the time Cordelia was five, had mastered the art of parenting said breed of children. She had whether the storm of every bigot that had crossed paths with her family, wiping away tears and soothing hurt emotions. At the time, she was the biggest activist in fighting for the rights of cross breeds and beasts of all kinds. She'd come face to face with monsters, both political and natural, and emerged smiling on the other side.

Waiting outside of the of Dumbledore's office for her to show up, Cordelia could only imagine what horrors that awaited her. Her hands worked overtime as she wrung them, leaning against the cold stone wall. The teachers had separated the girls, bringing Eva to the hospital wing and making her go straight to the Headmaster's office.

Her head fell into her hands, dread filling her. She was sure that her parents weren't exactly thrilled about being called to the school at midnight because their daughter had injured another student.

"Cordelia?"

Snapping her head up, she saw her mother and father walking toward her briskly. Her mother's arms flew around her, before she pulled back, looking her daughter over, a worried look planted on her face.

"What happened? There was a fight?"

Cordelia shook her head, placing her hands on her mother's.

"Mama, I'm alright. It wasn't my fault, I promise."

Ramona's bright blue eyes searched Cordelia's face before she nodded her head in agreement. Talis smiled slightly from behind his wife.

"From the looks of you," he said, his thick Russian accent filling his deep voice, "the fight was very, uh," he thought for a moment, finding the correct word to use, "one-sided?"

"_Konechno, Papa_."

A light chuckle escaped Cordelia and Talis, prompting a glare from Ramona.

"I'm glad the both of you think this is so funny." The two vampires quickly quieted, both looking at the ground. Ramona reached to her daughter, lifting her chin so that their eyes met.

"I'm relieved that you're alright." The woman smiled down at Cordelia, pushing a strand of black that had fallen onto her cheek. "You are grounded for the rest of your life."

Professor Dumbledore strode up to the family, a deep frown stitched on his face. His seriousness made Cordelia's heart race. He reached over to the tall vampire, placing his hand on his shoulder.

"Talis, my old friend."

Talis sadly smiled at the older man, returning his gesture, "Albus. I am sorry we have to meet in this way."

Albus extended his free hand, taking Ramona's hand and giving it a light squeeze.

"It is good to see you again, Ramona."

The woman nodded, sighing.

"I'm so sorry about this, Profe-"

Dumbledore held his hand up, cutting her off. He looked down at Cordelia who squirmed under his gaze. Her eyes drifted downward, avoiding contact with his.

His hand gestured to the Eagle statue that guarded his office.

"Shall we?"

* * *

Inside Dumbledore's office, the only people that remained were parents, children, Professor Slughorn and Dumbledore. Charlus and Lydia Pargass stood beside Eva, dressed in their more professional business attire. Charlus was a lawyer for the Ministry of Magic while Lydia was a gold digger from a well-off family. Eva and Lydia looked amazingly similar; both strikingly sharp, while Charlus was on the plump side. Suddenly, Cordelia knew why Eva hung around with Winifred so often— it was because she reminded her of her father.

Ramona and Talis stood on the other side of the room, Talis' hand resting on Cordelia's shoulder. Cordelia looked almost nothing like her mother. Ramona beamed with bright blonde hair and clear blue eyes, opposing every feature Cordelia possessed. She was tall and lean, coming about to her husband's shoulder. This was quite an accomplishment, however, seeing that Talis was almost 7 foot tall. Cordelia was on the shorter side of them. _"You get it from your _Babushka_," _Talis would say, _"She is a very small woman."_

They rivaled the Pargasses in their appearance. Her mother wore a long grey coat with a light blue dress underneath while her father simply wore his long black robe with a suit. Cordelia took comfort in knowing that no matter what happened, no matter what they did to her, her family would still be more attractive than the Pargass family.

Dumbledore stood behind his desk, one arm crossed behind him while the other leaned against the mantle of the floo port.

"What happened here tonight should never have occurred." Albus sighed, turning to face the families.

"What should never have occurred, Professor, was that _thing_ being let into this school!" Charlus snarled, gesturing to Cordelia. "If I would have ever known what kind of monsters you let in here—"

"She's not a monster, Charlus." Ramona glared at him. "She's a sixteen year old girl."

"She could have killed my little Eva, Ramona." Charlus shot back, trying to stroke the side of his daughter's face, only to have his hand pushed away roughly.

"Oh please." Ramona rolled her eyes before looking back to Dumbledore. "Albus, you know it was an accident. Cordelia has never done anything like this before."

Charlus straightened, "Maybe she is showing her true colors. You never know when animals will turn on you."

"You are saying my daughter is animal?" Talis asked, his voice low with anger. Fear was visible on Mr. Pargass's face as he shrunk away from Talis for a moment, before returning himself to his original posture.

"I am saying that she is obviously not fit for civilized society."

Professor Slughorn let out a disapproving chuckle. He stepped toward the Leonov family, his hand gesturing to them. "Miss Leonova has never demonstrated any ill will toward any student in her six years here. I have never been more impressed with a Slytherin student's integrity than I have with hers."

Dumbledore nodded in agreement. "Personally, I believe Miss Leonova is a fine young woman. I have gotten to know her over the years and know for a fact that she is s truly genuine girl."

Charlus laughed bitterly, his mouth forming into a sneer, "Well that is all just fine and dandy. What happens is she loses her temper again and snaps the head off of some poor unsuspecting student, hmmm?"

The entire room went silent. Bitter truth rang in his logic, making it painfully aware to Cordelia.

"He's right."

Every eye flew to Cordelia. She stood, her face downcast as she spoke. Tears dripped from her eyes as she tried to control her quickening breath, but failed miserably.

"I'm dangerous." Her voice shook as her hand flew to her mouth, pressing against it forcefully as if it would contain some small amount of the pain that well up inside her.

"I assume some sort of action will be taken, Professor." Charlus said, "I suggest breaking her wand."

Cordelia's face twisted in fear as she clutched the 10 1/2 inch, Rosewood shaft with Unicorn hair core against her chest. No words would come from her mouth. The only thing she could do was shake her head vigorously and quietly sob.

"This was not an act of magic." Dumbledore barked, standing in front of his chair, "If that is the method of punishment that you suggest, then I shall have to break Eva's wand as well. She, after all, did initiate the altercation."

Eva's mouth hung open in disbelief. Charlus opened his to say something but was cut off by Dumbledore.

"No, there is only one thing to do." He said, sitting and summoning a scroll from a cabinet on the far side of the room. He unravelled it, opening it on his desk.

Ramona leaned down, wrapping her arms around her child's shoulders. She pressed her forehead against the side of Cordelia's, closing her eyes. Talis sighed deeply, tightening his grip on her shoulder.

Dumbledore leaned on his elbows. His head dropped to his hands as a forlorn sigh resinated from him. After a moment, he looked back up, his face not hiding his deep displeasure.

"Cordelia Jane Leonova," he reached over to the scroll, signing it and placing a crimson stamp on the thick paper, "You are here by expelled from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry."

* * *

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	7. In the Outside World

**Phew! Here it is! Sorry it took me so long. I've had tons of school and work to catch up on. Also, this chapter has given me so much trouble! I almost had another version written, but then I scrapped it and started all over... twice. Anyways, I really hope you enjoy it!**

**-Grenn**

* * *

Remus sat at his desk, a textbook and notes sprawled out in front of him and a cup of hot tea by his side. He was almost finished. Releasing a deep sigh, he leaned back and took a sip of the bitter-sweet liquid that filled his cup. A migraine was beginning to radiate in his temples, giving him the signal that he should probably stop for the day.

He looked down at the now dull pages, trying to focus on the words, but his mind was too far removed. Taking another deep sip, he finished off his drink and tried to calm his nerves.

Dumbledore's visit a few weeks prior was still finding its way to the front of his mind.

_"__How on earth did he find me?"_ Remus asked himself over and over again, trying to accept that he would likely never know the answer.

The old wizard had showed up at his door step one day, his face as cheerful as ever.

_"__A teaching position?" Remus questioned, leaning his elbows on his knees as he sat in his overstuffed leather armchair. "I've never taught before in my life, Professor."_

_Dumbledore nodded in agreement from the small sofa that faced the fireplace that wasn't in use at the moment, "That is true, Remus, but you were an excellent student and I believe you received an Exceeds Expectations in Defense."_

_"__Professor—" he began to protest, but was immediately cut off by Dumbledore's hand._

_"__I do have ulterior motives, Remus." _

_The werewolf narrowed his eyes at the old man in curiosity, noticing the mood of his tone change from whimsical to serious in an instant._

_"__You do know that James and Lily's son Harry is a student at Hogwarts."_

_Remus' heart almost stopped. He hadn't seen Harry since the night he'd gone with Dumbledore to leave him at the Dursley's home. He'd wonder about the boy from time to time, trying to imagine if he'd look more like James or Lily as he grew._

_"__You also know that Sirius Black has escaped from Azkaban."_

_That name. He couldn't bear to hear it. He couldn't even bear to read it. That's why he'd been avoiding all newspapers for the passed few days. Not a day went by that he hadn't thought about what it would be like if Sirius would have never killed Harry's parents. He almost didn't get over their death and now it was being throw up in his face again._

_"__You want me to protect Harry." Remus knew where his old Headmaster was going with the conversation. _

_"__I was thinking," Dumbledore said, crossing one leg over the other, "Perhaps with you around, it would ward Sirius off; not give him any hope of getting close to the boy."_

_Remus sighed, running his hand back through his grey speckled hair. He had to do it. He had to help Harry. It was the only thing that he could do for his two fallen friends now. He knew Lily and James would be grateful to him. The thought of it warmed his spirit._

_"__You can expect me there, Professor."_

_Dumbledore's face lightened up again as he stood._

_"__Splendid!" he said, his hands latched his back and a smile on his face,"Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm late for a train to Russia. Good day, Remus."_

_With that, the wizard was gone. Apparated before Remus' very eyes with a loud crack, leaving him in a state of up set. _

_"__Russia?"_

Since the visit, he'd been tirelessly working on his lesson plan, trying to put together something that would actually help his students in the real world.

He was living in a house that James had given him in the countryside, where he spent most of his days reading or tending to the old house. It was nice being alone for his monthly transformations, but when Dumbledore had shown up, he realized how much he really did miss human contact.

His eyes wandered over to an old photograph sitting on his mantle. Half of it was missing. It used to be a picture of James, Sirius, and him at Harry's christening, each in their nicest clothing, smiling from ear to ear with Harry sleeping in James' arms in the middle. In his rage, he'd stripped Sirius from the picture, leaving only James, Harry, and himself.

He stood from his chair, making his way over to the picture for a closer look. Sirius' arm was still visible in the photo; hooked around James' neck.

Every time he saw the picture, he wondered how Sirius could do such a thing to Lily and James. He'd sold them out to the Dark Lord, who ultimately killed them in their home at Godrick's Hollow, leaving poor Harry as an orphan. Sadness rushed into anger as he thought of Sirius' escape from Azkaban. The night of the Potters' deaths, he'd sworn that he'd kill the person responsible for it; now he'd might get his chance.

There was a soft _click_ of glass on stone as he turned the picture face down, not being able to bear looking at it any longer.

* * *

"_Finally._" he thought, rubbing his face with his hand and yawning audibly. He was nearly to the end of the textbook, giving him a great sense of accomplishment. A tired smile surface on his lips as he lightly bent the thick, browning pages, turning it to the beginning of the next chapter. Glancing down at the content of the chapter, his heart nearly stopped as the words struck him.

'_Dealing with Vampires'_

The picture on the page was of a creature that almost had the appearance of a rat. The ears were severely pointed, it had no hair, the eyes were hollow, giving it the ere of not having an emotion. Everything about it was in stark contrast to what he'd come to know about the species.

His mind automatically raced back to the image of her. The long raven hair that he'd once ran his finger through. Her sparkling dark eyes that could have taken his soul whenever he was brave enough to meet them. Soft, pink lips that had once been pressed against his rough, scarred ones.

Cordelia Leonova was not this hideous creature that glared back at him from the page.

Every once in a while he'd think about her. Her memory would hit him at odd times; doing the dishes, reading a book, taking a shower. The last one was his personal favorite, but any time she'd pop up in his mind was a treat for him.

His deepest regret was that he'd never said goodbye to her. He remembered waking up the next morning and going down to the Great Hall for breakfast. It was stone silent except for hushed whispers that seemed to crop up at every table.

_"__Sirius," he said, placing his books on the table and swinging his legs over the bench, "What's going on? Why is everyone so quiet this morning?"_

_Sirius and James shifted uncomfortably while Peter avoided eye contact with him. He watched Sirius ruffle his thick curly hair awkwardly and lean into him._

_"__I'm sorry, Moony." he said, leaning on his crossed arms, his voice low._

_Remus' face twisted into a worried/confused expression. Fear welled up inside him. Sirius was never this serious._

_"__Mate," James cleared his throat and adjusted his glasses, "Leonova got expelled last night."_

_His mouth fell open. Perhaps they were mistaken._

_"__What?" he croaked, his voice thick with unbelief. "That's impossible."_

_"__She attacked Eva Pargass in the corridor." Sirius explained, "She's a vampire, Moons. She was probably the one that killed that deer in the Forbidden Forest. Guess that takes all the fun out of hunting for it."_

_The table fell as silent as the other tables while Remus' depression set in. He slumped forward on his elbows, looking down at his empty breakfast plate. Suddenly his appetite was gone._

_"__Good riddance, I'd say." _

_Every eye in the group turned to Peter, who sat shoving eggs into his mouth. _

_"__Who knows what she could have done if she'd been allowed to stay here. A danger to us all."_

_Remus' jaw clenched as he gritted his teeth. Anger rose in his chest, tempting him to say something very rude to his friend. Avoiding the temptation, he simply stood, snatching his books from the wooden table and storming out of the Hall._

_James and Sirius glared back at Peter after Remus had left. Picking up a roll, James threw it at Wormtail, pegging him in the forehead._

_"__What was that for?" Peter sputtered, his eyebrows knit together in annoyance._

_"__Shut it, you git." Sirius growled, digging back into his breakfast._

She was in the Daily Prophet for weeks after that. He would almost wretch every time he saw the miserable expression she held on her face as she was escorted in and out of Ministry trials. About a month later, however, the attention was turned back to muggle killings and whispers of war.

By this point in his life, he expected to be over her. But here he was, a man in his thirties and still hung up on a vision of a sixteen year old vampire. Maybe he needed some kind of counseling.

Nymphadora Tonks, a member of the Order of the Phoenix, constantly flirted with him. She'd wink at him in passing, sit next to him at meetings and dinners, and made numerous advances to which he never reciprocated. Each time he thought about her, a twinge of guilt sparked in his chest like he was doing something wrong.

He definitely needed counseling.

* * *

"Not much for redecorating, are you Professor?"

Dumbledore chuckled quietly from the doorway of his office, watching as the newcomer pulled her luggage from the floo port.

"You haven't changed a thing in sixteen years."

"Now, now, Cordelia," he crossed the room to greet her, "Why change that which is perfect?"

She flashed a smile at him, attempting to dust most of the soot off of her cloak, but not doing as good a job as she'd hoped. Albus took her thin hand in his and kissed it.

"It is a great honor to have you as a staff member this year, Miss Leonova."

Curtseying low, she dipped her head, "The honor is all mine."

Dumbledore watched as she stood erect once more, correcting her posture. The years of living with her almost exclusively vampiric family in the Siberian wilds had certainly given her a fresh demeanor. She had adopted some of the traits, he could tell.

With his free hand, he motioned behind him, standing aside. "You already know Severus Snape, our Potions Master."

A grin broke out on Cordelia's face as she craned her neck, seeing a tall man with a stern ere about him. He looked at her for a moment, letting a small smile creep across his lips. He looked just the same to her. Stringy dark hair that came to his shoulders; pale white skin; a glare that could shame you even if you hadn't done anything wrong. She couldn't contain herself as she ran to him, throwing her arms around his neck, forgetting about the large amount of filth she was getting on his clean potions smock. Initially, he stiffened, but relaxed after it seemed as though she wouldn't let go without his reciprocation.

Pulling back from him, she scanned his face once more. "It is very good to see you again, Severus."

"It is even better to see you, Cora."

From across the room, Albus cleared his throat, causing the pair to snap their attention his way.

"I assume you would like to settle into your room before dinner tonight, Miss Leonova. Severus will show you the way."

Cordelia watched as two small house elves entered the room and made their way over to her trunks, each pulling one onto its back. Guilt hit her as the little creatures groaned under the weight. She tried to reach out to them, to take the luggage, but was stopped by Severus.

"Don't insult them, Cora. They're doing their job."

"It don' 'urt, Miss." one of them squeaked out, looking up at her. Cordelia let out a weak smile, nodding lightly.

She felt Severus' hand tug hers, pulling her slightly towards the door. Turning, she began to follow him.

"Oh, and Miss Leonova," Dumbledore's voice caused her to look back over her shoulder. He smiled softly at her, "_Ya blagodaren za pomoshch'(*)_"

She flashed a final white smile at him, nodding at him before following Severus down the staircase.

* * *

Her room was near close to the entrance to the Slytherin common room in the dungeons. The two house elves dropped her suitcases in the middle of her room for her, telling her to come to the kitchen if she needed any more help. _"I most certainly will not._" she decided, watching them walk out of her room, rubbing their aching backs. She took off her dirty cloak, hanging it on a peg that jutted from the wall close to her bathroom door.

"I hope you like this room." Severus said, standing near her desk in the corner, his hands inside of his robe pockets.

She loved it, actually. It was the largest room she'd ever been allowed to stay in. She would dare say that it was bigger than her _Babushka_'s kitchen and sitting room put together. It was entirely decorated in silvers, golds, and deep greens. The king sized bed that sat beside a large glass window was dressed in a plush green comforter and satin golden sheets that led up to fluffy pillows with large embroidered silver snakes on them. A large bookshelf stood on one wall, reaching all the way to the ceiling, while a lavish dresser sat against the opposite.

"It really is wonderful, Sev." she declared, falling back onto her bed, her arms spread. A deep yawn rose from her belly, giving her a taste of how tired she really was.

"Dinner is in two hours, Cora." Snape called from the other side of the room, "I suggest you change into something you'd actually want people seeing you in."

Cordelia sat up on her elbows, making a face at him. "Would you like to approve my outfit for tonight or do you trust me to dress myself?"

The corners of Severus' lips slightly turned up in a smile, "No, no. I'm sure you'll choose wisely." With that he turned to leave.

"Two hours, Cora." he reminded from around the slightly opened door. He watched her stand, making her way to her bathroom.

"Thank you, mother." she called, shutting the door with a wink. He smiled after her, staring at her closed bathroom door.

"I've missed you." He whispered, letting the door close behind him.

* * *

Warm bath water slid over her skin as she sat down in the marble tub. It had been so long since she'd felt so secure. Hogwarts had always felt like home to her, so how could she turn down the chance to return?

Since her expulsion, she and Dumbledore had kept in touch. She wrote to him about how she'd graduated at the top of her class from a school that was tucked away in the mountains of Siberia. He kept her abreast of James and Lily Potter's deaths and Sirius' imprisonment. She never asked about Remus. The thought of him married with children and a loving wife made her stomach lurch with anxiety. She simply tried to not think about him, but sometimes the temptation was just too great.

She would tell Albus about her research. Going from region to region, she would hunt for hidden societies. Yetis, Jotuns, other vampires, werewolves. When her brother graduated, she brought him along.

About a month ago, he'd showed up at her doorstep at the cabin she was staying in with Ivor on the outskirts of a community of half-breed snow elves that lived underground in homes carved out of the thick ice in a glacier.

_"__Wasn't I expelled?" she questioned, looking down at the written request he'd handed her. Dumbledore nodded from the other side of the table, fingering his freshly empty shot glass._

_"__From what I understand, Cordelia,there is no reason for me not to hire you. You've more than made up for that little indiscretion when you were a child."_

_She leaned up, grabbing a greenish bottle by the neck and letting some of the clear liquid spill into their glasses._

_"__This class," she downed her drink swiftly, "you said it was about my research?"_

_Albus sucked in air, trying to calm the slight sting of the alcohol. Nodding, he placed it back on the table, tapping the rim._

_"__This is excellent Vodka, Cordelia."_

_She grinned, pouring them another shot. "Thank you, Professor. It was a gift from the chief of a Yeti tribe I visit. I initially made contact with them six years ago, but he still enjoys giving me presents whenever I stop by."_

_She looked up, seeing the elderly man's face smiling at her._

_"__That is precisely the reason I desire to form this class." he retorted, "How are we to stop this war of hatred if we do not teach students that there is something of value that each species holds?"_

_Cordelia nodded, lifting her glass slightly, "I can drink to that."_

_Dumbledore mimicked the gesture, clinking his glass to hers, "_Budem zdorovy (*)."

After the meeting, she'd spent days upon weeks scouring her journals, trying to find something to teach her students. She chose _A Guide to the Magical World and It's Hidden Societies _by Vangar the Terrible as her textbook, having read the thing over and over again in school.

By the time she left the tub, the water was murky from the soot of the floo port and the dirt of her many days of travel. Wrapping a robe around her body, she stood in front of her mirror, brushing her wet hair.

She really hadn't changed since she attended Hogwarts, she thought. Her black hair was still long; maybe a little longer. Her bust had grown a bit along with her hips, but not too drastically. She might have been a few inches taller. As she stood examining herself, she felt as though she was about to begin her first year again and butterflies awoke in her stomach.

She smiled. Of course she was about to begin her first year as a teacher. She was going to be with Severus in the place where they'd gotten to know each other and depend upon one another. Only this time, there wouldn't be any boys to distract her. There wasn't going to be any flirting from across a classroom or hoping to 'accidentally' bump into someone in the corridor. Cordelia Leonova was an adult now.

With a new sense of confidence driving her, she dried her hair, pulling the long strands on each side of her head away from her face and clipping them in the back. She brushed on some makeup, but so much that she was embarrassing herself. Pulling on her flowing black long-sleeved dress with the slit up the thigh and her five inch black high heels, she stopped in front of her door.

A moment of calmness washed over her as she took a deep breath and exhaled. Was she really ready for this? Her fingers brushed the cool metal of the door handle. There was only one way to find out.

* * *

The Great Hall buzzed with activity. New and old students chatted loudly, pulling food from piles on the long wooden tables and collecting it on their dinner plates. Remus sat, watching them and trying to stop the memories that flooded his mind. Harry, Ron, and Hermione sat at the Gryffindor table, their head close together, seemingly talking about what had just transpired on the train. Dementors had been sent to the school, searching for Sirius Black. One had come into the car he shared with the young teens, attacking Harry.

He couldn't believe those monsters were allowed roam so freely, although he did understand their quest for Sirius Black.

"How are you then, Remus?" Filius Flitwick asked from his side. Remus glanced down at him, pouring pumpkin juice into his goblet.

"Fair, I'd say, Filius."

Dumbledore stood from his chair, making his way to the podium at the front of the Hall. Lifting his hands into the air, he calmed the room.

Taking a sip from his cup, Remus couldn't help but smile.

* * *

She was late for dinner. Rolling her eyes at her own actions she quickly trotted down the hallway. Why did she have to be so far away from the Great Hall?

_"__Welcome to another year at Hogwarts."_

Her heels made a soft _click clack_ as she quickened her pace. The only thing in her mind was the dread of what Severus would say to her about her tardiness. She could almost hear his condescending tone, chiding her about having plenty of time to get ready and get to the Great Hall in a timely manner.

_"__And a special welcome to all the first year students. I hope your time here is as pleasurable and filled with joy as the times of the students before you."_

Filch stood in the hallway outside of the large room, his cat, Mrs. Norris, clutched in his arms.

"You're late, Professor." he sneered, prompting a growl from the ball of fluff he held.

_"__This year, we have a few new additions to the teaching staff. Professor Remus Lupin will be in charge of your Defense Against the Dark Arts classes."_

Cordelia backed away from the man, trying not to make eye contact. She was a vampire, but he was indeed the creepiest person she'd ever met.

_"__Along with Professor Lupin, I'm pleased to announce another new addition. The instructor for the recently developed class Hidden Societies of the Magical World."_

Nervously, she held her hand against the metal knob. She tried to tame her quickening heart rate, closing her eyes.

"Well," Filch's gruff voice called from behind her, "Are you going in or not?"

She rolled her eyes, not turning to respond. Exhaling, she pushed the door open, revealing the filled room.

"Miss Cordelia Leonova."

Dumbledore motioned to her, causing a wave of students turning to see her. Her eyes swept the room, seeing all of the young faces gawking at her. Slowly, she walked to the front, whispered breaking out from every table as she passed. Words like _vampire _and _attacker_ rang in her ears, but she chose to ignore them.

She glanced to the Gryffindor table momentarily. Suddenly, James Potter was sitting at the table, his dark hair disheveled in its usual way. Shock hit her as she did a double take, looking over at the boy. He wasn't James. He was different. He looked like a perfect mixture of Lily and James, his eyes bright like his mother's while his facial structure screamed of his father. '_No,' _she thought, shaking her head lightly, '_That must be Harry.'_

Taking Dumbledore's outstretched hand, she turned to face the crowd, a smile planted lightly on her lips.

"Sorry." she mouthed to the older man, as she turned to take her place at the teacher's table. He simply smirked at her, nudging his head back toward the table, telling her to take her seat. She nodded, glancing up at her colleagues.

"Cordelia?"

The voice sounded so familiar, as if it was a melody she hadn't heard for a long time. Studying the row, she searched for its origin and, to her surprise, found it standing at the very end. He looked so different than the last time she'd seen him, but she would recognize him anywhere. His hair held a few flecks of grey and his skin, a few more scars. The same brown eyes that sparkled at her when they were kids were calling to her now. He was still so handsome to her, making her heart pound so hard that she was scared everyone could hear. Her breath hastened, she fought to retain control.

Making her way to the empty chair beside Severus, she broke eye contact with him, dropping slowly into her seat. Remus did the same on the other side of the table as she sat, snapping back to his senses and clearing his throat.

Severus glanced over at her lazily, slicing a piece of chicken in half. He opened his mouth to say something, but was immediately cut off by her glare.

"Shut it, Sev."

* * *

Remus sat at his end of the table, trying to listen to the rest of Albus' speech, but his mind kept floating back to her. Shock was still in his system. The moment Dumbledore had called her name, he'd involuntarily shot up from his seat. She was so beautiful. As she neared the teacher's table, he could smell her; she still smelled the same. Years of fantasizing about seeing her again, and here he was, living the dream. Her hair was longer, reaching the middle of her back. She had developed well; her breasts and hips filling out the revealing dress she wore.

"Cordelia?" he'd called out, soliciting a glance from her. Those dark eyes still stopped his heart. His brain shut down, unable to find something else to say, so he watched her walk to her seat beside Severus, sitting down after her.

Flitwick eyed him, amusement in his stare. Clearing his throat, he turned his attention back to Albus, or at least attempted to.

Narrowing his eyes, he glared at the back of the old man's head. This was his doing. Some day, he'd either have to kiss him or murder him for doing this. For the moment, it was still up in the air which was going to take place.

* * *

**So, it has come to my attention that some people don't speak Russian. I've had to put the English sounding way to say things in the story because, I mean, I can't even read Russian letters.**

**Dumbledore says: * I am grateful for your help**

***Let us stay healthy**

**Please review. I love to hear feedback. I grow from it. It is the water to my literary soil. (Not really, but it certainly is nice to hear.)**


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